as a note before i begin. i've never gotten flowers from anyone in my life (except my dad for my birthday). it's always made me a little sad to think that i've never found anyone romantic enough to give me flowers.
and now onto today's story.
i went for a walk this morning along the beach and into a little park. there are flowers growing everywhere here. plumeria trees, hibiscus, vines that creep and cover everything and are decorated with round purple flowers, flowers with gossamer thin petals or thick waxy ones. flowers from hawaiian myths about gods and goddesses. don't piss off ancient hawaiian goddess or she will take you and your lover and make you into a flower, then split you in half and send half to grow by the ocean and half to grow in the mountain. the bushes bloom into fat glossy white berries and little white flowers that are exactly half a flower. like a daisy with petals on one side. the flowers with petals that grow on the other side grow in the mountains. there are little red flowers on trees and crown flower trees in the park. crown flower trees just like there used to be at my elementary school. and we'd pick the fat fuzzy caterpillars that ate them and keep them in jars until they became monarch butterflies. The smell of that park, between the butterflies and the lawnmower smelled just like recess back when i was young. it's easier to see the beauty now.
the beauty in the little fish in the lagoon. even the beauty in the assorted sizes and shapes of tourists that were just beginning to swarm the area. i like to go early before they're all there and covering everything and before the sun soaks it all in heat. in the morning the colors are clear and the air isn't too full of sunscreen smell and heat.
and that's when i realize that i don't need someone to go pay for flowers and bring them to me dead in a box. that my island has been giving me flowers with every step i take my whole life here.
and i've just been too blind to see it.
today i got flowers. and i'll get them everyday for the next 2 weeks i'm here. and everyday i come back in the future.
sometimes i think you're given everything you need. you just need to realise what that is
